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| More Than a Beer by Omoruyi Uwuigiaren |
On
a wet Sunday morning, I strolled by a church. Service was in full swing and it
was a full house. There was hardly any space left for anyone to sit. It’s the
culture in this part of the world for church service to be packed with humans
seeking the face of God for solution to their problems. The days are evil,
things are hard and many people are disgruntled. So they are constantly on the lookout
for any resemblance of Jesus Christ walking on water.
In
this dark times, the church is where some people unwind or find succor. Armed
with dangerous prayer points, members could imagine themselves beat Satan to
death. It’s almost a free world. Everyone is encouraged to engage in mental and
spiritual exercise to stay alive. With the exercise, comes the right to cry
their hearts out and then walk back home either to face the mountain killing
them or be liberated. It is hard to be in this system and not get drawn into
the emotional hole. It is a nightmare. Not throwing your weight behind this
could make any overzealous soul target you Satan. Anyone riding on the wings of
righteousness is not far away from redemption.
Some
are fortunate to overcome after the marathon prayer exercise. Others stay the
same and may need to look elsewhere for solution. In reality, not every
nightmare requires some spiritual exercise to overcome. Some problems require strict
adherence to physical solution before they can go away. So don’t approach
physical problems with spiritual solutions. It’s like a Carmel trying to go
through the eyes of a needle.
The
world is not some distant country that must require a local travel guide in
that country to show you the way round. Life is tough and it is far more
complex than mere praying every now and then. Some people have died trying to
figure out their problems. In clear terms, not all problems require you to fast
and pray before they can be solved.
Back
to my story. The pastor was preaching about beer and beer parlour. He was
spitting venom from the altar and the microphone was going to go up in flames. Words
that could set a thousand feet on the run were dropping from his mouth like the
night rain. It was his turn to sound like John the Baptist!
Break
the camel’s back and get his pound of flesh. Whether his utterances were going
to mislead the sheep was not the question. His neck was stretched like the
peacock. His eyes crimson red. And his broad shoulders were almost competing
with the skull that sat on his poor neck. Today was his day. Perhaps, the best
day of his life. People will have much to worry. He was desperate to leave an
impression that he was the next best thing.
The
pulpit should be his stumping ground. He needs the space to pass his message. He
has come of age. His type should never be in the background doing all the dirty
work for the General Overseer. They should share the responsibility at the very
top. Eat from the same table and if possible share the proceeds from the church
equally. He needed to drill home his point before the time keeper takes the
microphone from him and dispense him like a piece of trash. The work of God is
not bread and butter. It is not an avenue to escape from the cruel hands of
hell, escape problems caused by your poor judgment. It is a battle field where
God’s generals are born and made. As hard as it may seem, God does not
discriminate against anyone.
Mega
churches like the Living Faith Tabernacle aka Winners Chapel are notoriously
time cautious. It is understandable why they are so. Most of the time, they
have three or more Sunday services to complete before the setting sun. It’s a
marathon. The race never ends until the sun goes down. The setting sun is the
target. Once the services are done, they can go home. So anything that will
hinder the church from meeting this target is considered satanic and is easily
dispensed.
On
a good day, a pastor hardly exceeds an hour preaching on the pulpit. It is no
news that people from all occupations attend church service. The pastor could
run into trouble trying to impress people who are even more educated than
himself. To be safe, be as simple as possible and as quickly as you can.
The
pastor is expected to consistently put the devil to the sword or his employers
will look elsewhere. It’s a rat race. Every preacher should know it’s a thin
line between love and hate. Night and day. Winning and losing. Once you are at
your wits end, the church wields the big stick and the culprit is tossed out of
the window. You cannot last in the defense of evil. It’s a pain in the ass and
there’s nothing you can do about it.
Preaching
about beer and beer parlour is an interesting topic. But it could get some members
agitated, especially men with protrude bellies who can hardly do without
tasting a bottle of beer. You are expected to choose your strength over your
weakness anytime you are asked to preach. The areas that attract people positively
to you is your strength. Give it everything you have got to drive home your
point. It is easy for anyone to preach about holiness, salvation and the love
of Jesus Christ. If any preacher finds himself struggling to do these things,
then he should leave the stage and find another job.
If
a bottle of beer belongs to Caesar, don’t kill yourself trying to remind the
people how it looks like. They already
have an idea about it. Preach the love of Jesus Christ. There is no end to what
the power of Jesus Christ can do. If a man cannot elevate himself above
mediocrity, he is finished.
So
I slowed down to listen to the preacher. It was necessary. I could learn a
thing or two from him. I wanted to know the category that the preacher belongs.
Many are too quick to judge and they end making terrible mistakes. I don’t want
to fall into this hole. I stood in a corner, leaned against the wall and faced
the church. Heaven may have recognized my presence as one of the many people
that attended church service that day. That cannot be said of the church. I am
not sure anyone knew that a poor creature like me was outside the church
listening to their pastor.
I
wanted to be sure if he was educated or not. Most times, education plays an
important role in how people approach situations. This is so about preachers
too. The level of education of a preacher reflects in the way he or she
understands the Bible and explains it. They are going to act along this line. If
the preacher is educated, it is going to be his strength and advantage. If he
could barely read and write, he will rely heavily on “hear say” and the level
of his own understanding of the Bible to teach. In some cases, they may frown
at the idea of doing research, studying to improve because they feel the Holy
Spirit will always guide them. This could be calamitous if such person is
allowed to handle sensitive matters. Often
than not, they will preach from this weak point of view and poor knowledge base.
If
he was a mature pastor, it would show in his utterance. He will not sound
stupid to everyone listening to him. He was either going to win me over to his
church or lose me. One thing is surely going to happen.
Pastors
are advised to preach from their strength and not from their weakness. Trying
to impress people could backfire. Trying to teach on topics that are not
familiar could put the pastor in the spotlight. Nowadays, nobody wants to
listen to a fool, especially when he calls himself a man of God. You are easily
scrutinized and slaughtered. Your chance of making is so slim that you need to
be at your best. To do this, preach from your strength. If teaching solely
about holiness is what gets people attracted to your church, stay on it. Preach
holiness for as long as you can. Weave your stories around it. When you try to stray
and talk about issues that you know nothing about, you will ruin everything.
Preaching
from your strength gives vigour, power and zest. You are easily released to the
supernatural and the members are easily touched and carried along. Doing it the
other way, will only make you struggle and in the long run, you will sound
stupid.
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| Ruyi's World of Book and Stories |
As
I listened, I noticed the pastor was struggling to choose his words. It was as
if he was made to eat hot yam porridge against his wish. His maturity was
called into question. His weakness was glaring for all eyes to see. He was
boring and cold.
Why
is this fellow talking about beer on a wet Sunday morning? I wondered as I
waited for him to maneuver through the problems he had created for himself and
drop the main crust of the message.
Then
he cleared his throat and said it was sin to be seen in a beer parlour. I was
not inside the church but I could imagine how uncomfortable some of the members
could have been. He argued that people who see you in the beer parlour will
think you are a sinner.
The
moment he made the point, it was like he had won a lottery. Or perhaps, he had
finally found his voice and was going to break the head of Satan. Things are
suddenly falling into place for him. The frog that was in his throat had disappeared
and heaven will fall.
The
reward for his comment was a deafening silence in the church. I guess the members
were not comfortable. This type of message is going to affect his rating going
forward.
Many
people still do not understand that we are in 21st century. Telling
people who know that there are many activities that go on in a bar that it is
sin to be there is evil enough. It is poor on the path of the preacher. You shouldn’t
make statements that will warrant people to doubt your calling.
His
argument did not go down well with me too. First, why do people worry about how
people view them? Is that not a sign of weakness? Why do I have to worry about
what people say about me? Even Jesus Christ ate with a sinner like Zachaeus.
The
preacher forgot that almost all beer parlours in Lagos sell pepper soup, fried
meat, soft drinks and lots more. It is called beer parlour does not mean only beer
is sold there. He should know that not everyone that goes into a beer parlour to
drink. Some people go there to eat and have meetings. God’s work is more than a
beer.
About
the Author
Omoruyi
Uwuigiaren is a former cartoonist turned writer. When he was a kid, he loved
music and composed songs for his high school band. After school, he wanted to
pursue a career in music. Instead he embraced writing and studied Mass
Communications. His literary works and books have appeared in Moronic Ox
Literary and Cultural Journal, Qwenu, Open Books, Urban News Express Online and
many more. He’s the owner of Ruyi’s World
of Books and Stories.
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